Being Mothered

We love to celebrate the profound impact of mothering. Question is, how well do we accept mothering ourselves?

Do we give ourselves the understanding and grace that we give others? 

Do we see ourselves with the same mama bear unconditional, protective love with which we see our kids? 

Do we truly see and cherish our unique spiritual value?

I recently spent a weekend with a beautiful group of women at an HHJ retreat. The foundation for our conversations was Jay Shetty’s On Purpose podcast episode about the five types of relationships that we need most to go beyond the shallow – those of belonging, legacy, independence, safety, and service.

Something became glaringly obvious to me that weekend. 

While I love to encourage, mentor, and care for others, I’m not as comfortable asking for support. I assume how busy others are, and I don’t want them to feel obligated to me.

Yet I want to learn from and be mothered by others. 

It’s one thing to know what we want, and another to ask for it.

It’s easy to be vulnerable on paper here, but sitting in the hot seat in front of a group of women that weekend, with all eyes on me, was scary.

“I don’t want to hog the limelight or take too much of their time. I don’t want them to think I’m selfish. How can I divert the conversation back to them?” 

Sound familiar?

Yet in that moment, they were giving me the very thing I quietly yearned for. They invited me into the circle. They loved me the way I wanted to be loved.

I needed to allow it. 

I also see that allowing others to care for us gives them an opportunity to carry out their own legacy and desire to serve. 

Sometimes our hesitation to reach out can even be misinterpreted as our not valuing what someone else offers us!

What I call "Mother Love" sees, encourages, protects and champions. Accepting this for ourselves is not selfish. It completes the circle of loving and being loved.

Don’t get me wrong. HHJ retreats aren’t about being put on the spot to divulge our most vulnerable secrets! Instead, they give us a rare invitation to sister, or mother, one another. They offer time and a safe environment to explore our inner lives in ways that lift us and encourage us to grow.

Going beyond my comfort zone that weekend, while being embraced within a trusting circle of women, has opened me to an intentional journey of asking others to mentor and mother me.

I accept! 

“Be with those who help your being.”
– Rumi