What Kind of Woman Am I?

Do you ever find yourself drawn into battle? Sometimes we need to summon an unwavering strength and sense of grace to protect what we love. 

Recently, I wrote about the restoration of my marriage. It came to me this week that the same unyielding mama bear protection and love that I have for my children, and my husband, is what our world needs. 

This loving and protecting kind of womanhood lifts and restores world consciousness, and is the foundation of a healthy, peaceful society.

I believe in my husband, unreservedly - though never blindly - since I discovered that it is part of a powerful, unconditional love. I understand what unwavering faith feels like from when my son fought in Afghanistan. And I think about the importance of hope and trust in Good as I contemplate the world that my grandchildren are being raised in. We cannot be complacent; we must be expectant.

We may be making that transition from daily responsibilities for children and career to a more flexible schedule, but we are by no means done! If anything, this is our time to raise up our world and support those following in our footsteps.

Right now, our world wants us to be a polite audience for its drama. I know we’ve reached a tipping point when women whom I love and know for their pure joy are yearning to feel the very quality that has always so naturally defined them. If we begin to lose the essence of our strength, and how we inspire and lift others, it’s time to love and protect ourselves!

We begin by lifting ourselves, then lifting one another. This is why the kind of sisterhood that Honest Heart Journeys nurtures is vital. 

Giving ourselves permission to care for ourselves begins with grace. It asks us to allow ourselves the same gentle patience, forgiveness, and compassion that we give others. Self-condemnation is only a distraction falsely parading as modesty. A genuine desire for self-knowledge and growth, and to support others, gives us a presence and energy that is calm, confident, and certain. Others feel it. We then honor ourselves and safely and honestly nurture others.

Genuine love for ourselves makes us more discerning about the kinds of relationships that we invest in, knowing that we are worth having others in our lives who see our unique beauty and don’t judge out of petty weakness, but hold us accountable to be our best. We then have the opportunity and duty to do the same for others. This genuine outlook defines a sense of reciprocal sisterhood in which we are all valued and lifted, and worthy.

If we can drop comparing ourselves to others - including the time suck of monitoring perfectly-curated social media profiles - we can show a focused strength. I know how hard this can be! There’s no need to follow the vain, insecure tendency to tear down others so that we can feel better by comparison. Being strong and secure means we are confident in our own gifts, clear about our distinct purpose, and most importantly, honor our divine Source, that knows, establishes, and maintains all that we are. 

Taking this stand also models for women following us the kind of healthy relationships that we want for them - with the Divine, themselves, others, and the world.

If we value ourselves and our bigger purpose within the world, we then humble ourselves to ask for help, and we choose wisely who we ask. If we’ve invested in true, unwavering sisterhood, we will find the kind of relationships in which we recognize and joyously live our Fullness and lift our world.

If you’re uncertain about the strength that you bring, take out pen and paper, head it with “I am” and fill the page with who you are, and who you want to be - whether you believe it or not at the moment. Stay with it daily, and you’ll begin to see everything you desire: unlimited, free, inspired, clear, strong, focused, full of grace, at peace, satisfied, fully present, powerful, caring, aware, joyous, enough….

If you want to feel what grace is, see yourself and others as completely known and understood; forever in the presence of, and unconditionally loved by, an infinite, unlimited, all-good Power. 

That’s enough to support our Fullness….which is what we all need.

“God has not given us vast learning to solve all problems, or unfailing 

wisdom to direct all the wanderings of our brothers’ lives; but He has 

given to every one of us the power to be spiritual, and by our spirituality, 

to lift and enlarge and enlighten the lives we touch.”

- Phillips Brooks, Episcopal Bishop