Wisdom Rising

I climbed a mountain this week. Each step toward the 14,196 ft summit reminded me of the journey I’ve been on. One I’m still on. The climb was a stunning metaphor for mental life transitions that I’m feeling.

I never questioned if I could reach the peak. I’ve climbed plenty of mountains in my lifetime. My bucket list even includes several treks. There’s something about the journey from A to B that drives and fulfills me – both the defined completeness, and all that I learn in between.

I’ve usually been the mama bear who stays toward the back of a climb, keeping my mind off myself as I cheer on others. It’s a welcome position that brings me genuine joy. I remember handing my phone to a high school kid from New York City at the summit and saying, “Call your mom.” It’s supporting the kids who swear they’ll never make it, but do, that invigorates me. 

On this week’s trek, my husband remained with me while others pulled ahead. I’m a “steady up” girl, and he’s a “careful down” guy. It was clear that we were partnered for the day, and we danced a beautiful ten hour give and take of gentle encouragement and care. The experience represented where we are in life now. 

While our family gathered in the Colorado mountains this week, we celebrated how our children have built lives of their own. I found myself listening for ways to pass the baton, to acknowledge that my children are their own masters. I’m truly content now sitting with a baby snuggled in my lap as everyone interacts. This week, I watched two grand babies who are two months apart meet for the first time and enjoyed a lazy afternoon at the lake while my son took a rare day off work. I am deeply satisfied in everyone’s presence, no matter the conversation. Presence is enough.

That being said, I don’t want to fade behind others’ conversations. So, how do I tell them that I’m not done yet, that I don’t want to be only an observer?

The years of caring for them and working hard while they grew up were precious. My treasure. In a strange way, though, I feel I’m just beginning. I feel no different than when I was a young mother with infants. Only now, I’m wiser, more centered, and confident. I’m ready to fully share myself. 

As I climbed with my husband that day on the mountain, a momentary, “Can I make it?” crept in. It felt more physically taxing. I remembered the 80 year old couple who I’d watched summit that same mountain over 25 years earlier. They’ve been my inspiration for years, and I want to do the same for others. 

I want to live an expanded sense of life’s natural and unlimited potential. I want to look age square in the face and not be discouraged by things that don’t feel or look the same as they used to. It’s time for the mental game.

As we continued up the trail, I found myself going within – back to sweet, familiar hymns that have always brought me peace. The phrase, “Keep Thou my child on upward wing tonight” found new meaning. This time, I shifted from tucking my children in to cherishing my own youth and vitality and innocent, childlike trust. 

I circulated a list of affirming qualities in thought that have guided and strengthened me this past year. They’ve given me new life and grounding, and they lifted me as I climbed.

I am…  
   
     Inspired: “in Spirit”, at one with the Divine, wide open, receptive to Good

     Unlimited: I feel infinite possibilities; there's nothing I can’t know or pursue       

     Free: “from” limitation and fear; “to” know and be my fullness   
  
     Grateful: I recognize and acknowledge the beauty in and around me

     Expectant:  I'm confident of, looking for, and celebrating natural, ongoing Good

I asked God to show me how to embrace this new phase of life with steady grace. And I found strength in joy – from the shifting views as I climbed, to gratitude for my husband’s quiet, patient presence.

After we scaled rocks at the top to join family members for a welcome lunch at the peak, we turned back down the mountain. It soon became clear that the toughest part of the hike was ahead of us, and I took on the role of encourager.

I felt a deep, mature calm as we descended. My purpose at this point in life is to bless from the infinite wealth of who I am, shaped by all that I’ve both humbly surrendered and learned. I’ve gained clarity and strength and a centeredness from what I’ve finally accepted for myself, all of which is given by infinite Source.

What would our world be like if we all understood that true wisdom and grace comes through facing challenges? From the tough climbs, up and out of limitation? From discovering and embracing our full capacity and learning to support in new ways? I love claiming this time as a wisdom nomad.

A dear sister friend shared this with me this week: 
    
     One day, the mountain     
     that is in front of you will      
     be so far behind you, it will     
     barely be visible in the      
     distance. But the person you     
     become in learning to get     
     over it? That will stay with     
     you forever. And that is the     
     point of the mountain.                 
               - Brianna Wiest

I have more mountain trails in my future, different individuals to journey with, fresh roles to embrace, and rising wisdom with which to contribute. I am not just an observer. I am learning to draw from a deep well of worth.